Love is complicated.

John and Megan are married and Caitlin is John's mistress. Matt is the devil whispering in John's ear to kill Megan to be with Caitlin. John goes through with it and goes to Caitlin with the blood still on his hands. Caitlin is disgusted and claims she'll turn him in. Matt whispers in John's ear to kill Caitlin as well.

-Matt

The Ending

The Viewing Overlord (VO) progressively changes the channels faster and faster. It gets to a point where Matt, John, Megan, and Caitlin are literally running across the stage as fast as they can and the sound eventually becomes constant static. Eventually the VO gets fed up and slams the remote down.

VIEWING OVERLORD
Screw this, there's nothing on! I'm going outside!

MATT, JOHN, MEGAN, CAITLIN
No!

The VO hits the power button on the remote and her screen goes black. The four on stage drop dead. The house lights come up.

-Matt

Sacrifice

The couch is an altar. John is a priest. Matt and Megan carry in Caitlin, tied up and gagged. John sacrifices her.

-Matt

Dreaming.

Caitlin walks on to the stage and lays down on the couch. Exhausted, she falls asleep. A ukelele playing a cheery tune is heard. John rises from behind the couch, playing ukelele in a horse mask. Caitlin wakes up and looks and John, the audience, then back at John.
Caitlin
Huh. John?
       John gives a little bow to Caitlin.
I have to be dreaming.
       John shrugs.
You don't play the ukelele.
       John walks out from behind the couch as Megan and Matt enter. Megan goes downstage corner right, Matt downstage corner left. John motions Caitlin to come with him. The two walk downstage center.

Caitlin
John.. what's going on?
       Matt and Megan say their lines together, voices overlapping. They can be read off a paper if need be. Or improvised. They're speaking to the audience. 
Matt
Where am I?
If I'm onstage and the audience is watching me but I'm watching the audience then why is there a stage?
Megan
Who are you?
Where is this going?
What time is it?
       pause.
Caitlin
Hi?
Matt
Hey, how are you?
No, I'm fine.
I do hope you got here alright.
Megan
Oh, hello!
Are you sure you don't want to sit down?
It's nice to meet you.
       Caitlin takes the mask off of John, who's wearing swimming goggles underneath. Caitlin
What's going on?
John
Your thoughts are echoing.

no idea where this goes. But I know it could be really good.
-John. 

The magic couch

John is a bad magician who has messed up many tricks. He pulls hats out of rabbits and keeps on breaking his wand. His final trick is to make his assistant Megan disappear. He fails many times. Somehow she ends up being stuffed into the couch.

-Megan

En Riktning

John and matt are members of a sweedish boyband trying to woo the girls and possibly the audience.
-Caitlin

Problem

Matt is sitting on the couch with a glass of water. Megan walks in.

MEGAN
Is something wrong?

MATT
I think I have a drinking problem.

Matt puts the glass to his temple and pours it all over himself.

-Matt

HEY KIDS.

Matt runs on in a full Captain Canada uniform, miming superhero poses and his best Katz impression. John runs on with his guitar.

John
HEY KIDS. Do you know what time it is?

(sung)
He's born in a cabin on boxing day,
Raised by wolverines...
(sarah changes the channel)

-John.

Poetry night

One by one we stand up on the couch and recite lyrics to crappy pop songs and treat them as deep poems.
-Caitlin

Sherlock

John plays a young Sherlock Holmes investigating the mysterious death of Megan. Matt plays an annoyed John Watson and Caitlin plays a cop.
-Caitlin

Karaoke

Karaoke night. Couch is a stage.

-Matt

Prostate Exam

Matt is getting a prostate exam from John. Megan and Caitlin are hot nurses holding up a sheet over Matt's ass. John goes behind the sheet, rams his fist in and pulls out Matt's heart, claiming he doesn't need it.

-Matt, John, Megan

The Four Horsemen

The four actors are the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. Matt is Death, John is War, Caitlin is Pestilence and Megan is Famine. They are riding towards Earth to destroy it and are lost.

-Matt

WHAT THE FUCK

Matt takes out a small table, an onion, and a knife. He dices it finely and then snorts it like cocaine.

MATT
AHHHH! WHAT THE FUCK!

-Matt

Christmas Caroling

Megan, Matt and Caitlin are Christmas caroling. Every bell they ring John answers and somehow slams the door in their faces.

-Megan

Dog Show

Matt, Caitlin and Megan are crouching on the couch as if they are dogs. John is the judge and has each go through various hoops (literal and figurative) before deciding a winner.

-Matt

GET OFF OF ME

Matt and Caitlin are Siamese twins, they're sharing a giant sweatshirt. They are sick of each other.

-Matt

Charades.

       Matt and Megan are a suburban married couple and invite their friends, fellow suburban married couple, John and Caitlin over for the annual Dinner Party. Megan comes in and turns on the lamp. Matt is walking on from stageleft as the doorbell rings. John and Caitlin are standing stage right. 

Matt

Oh, they're here. 

       Matt opens the door.

Matt

Hey you guys!

John

Hey Matt (greetings.. bla bla)

Matt

Yeah, come on in.

Megan

We're just gonna start with a game or two before dinner.

Caitlin 

Oh alright--

Matt

Yeah, have a seat.

       John and Caitlin take the stageleft side of the couch.

John

What're we playing?

Matt

(proud and happy) Megan and I were thinking for this week.. Charades.

Caitlin

OOOOH I love charades.

Megan

Matthew's an expert.

John

What would the category be?

Megan

Matthew?

Matt

Guest's choice.

Caitlin

John.. movies. 

John

Yeah, movies.

       everyone happily agrees. 

John

Who starts?

Matt

Guests first.

John

(to Caitlin) Ladies first.

      Caitlin gets off the couch. Matt and Megan take the stageright side of the couch. Caitlin very simply acts out Star Wars. Matt guesses it within the first few gestures. John and Caitlin are surprised at his expertise. Megan's proud. Caitlin sits back down next to John.

Matt

Megan?

       Megan smiles and gets off the couch. She then acts out the most gory and gruesome section of whatever horror movie she can think of. John and Caitlin are scared and a bit nauseous. 

I don't know where it goes from here. The whole premise is, Megan acts out something really horribly gory and disgusting every time she goes up. She can even whisper to Matt before he goes up and he does The Human Centipede or something. Sooner or later, John and Caitlin try to one up Matt and Megan, so they act out something that ends with Megan vomiting behind the couch and Matt kicking them out. 

THE END.

-John. 

Escape to Africa

Megan, John, Matt and Caitlin are animals in a zoo plotting their escape to Africa.  John is a lion, I'm not sure of who everyone else is.  John is the leader.

-Megan

Caitlin learns german

Caitlin is listening to a tape meant to teach her German but it turns into a Nazi instruction tape
-Megan, John and Caitlin